I've given up on the challenge I can't keep up with it at all. Anyway back to the blog at hand.
Most People have a best friend, at least one, someone who knows them inside out. My mother has four, my brother has a few, my boyfriend, people I went to college with, people at uni, people at work. Everyone seems to have a bestfriend with the exception of me. Bit over dramatic, I'm sure there are people outthere who don't have best friends. Everyone I know seems to have at least one though.
Boyfriends aren't the same as bestfriends. I always seem to drift though I make friends but they never seem to stick. Like I'm that awkward puzzle piece that just floats over all the others and trys to fit with others.
I always thought this was a bad thing and then I realised I had something better, something that would and never could hurt me.
While most people have best friends, I have Harry Potter and Diagnosis Murder. This is not to say that I'm crazy, let me explain...
I don't remember the first time I watched Diagnosis Murder but I remeber vividly when I was at school. I used to set my video recorder every day for 3 years maybe. 2:15 on the dot and the recorder would do it's thing taping my precious programme, because, it was mine. Thats what I told myself anywho.
I can remember the way it felt, I would get home but I would never truly feel home until I sat down in front of that, It's strange, it was like a wave crashed over me and suddenly I was like a ghost, a mute who was a part of this wonderful world but at the same time I never truly was. I'm not crazy, I never used to imagine them talking to me or anything. It was just a sense of belonging a sense of wonderment and magic at it.
Potter was like this for me to, in particular Prisoner Of Azkaban, I only had to open the book and this wave crashed over we, this wave of feeling like I belonged somewhere. It was amazing.
On this feeling alone I got through anything and everything in my life, anytime I felt sad insecure, down upset, angry. I didn't need anyone to hug me, to comfort me to talk to.
I just used to open these books or watch this programme and everything would fade into oblivion. I imagine the rush could be compared to what an addict feels, because I did become addicted to them.
So while most people had best friends I had these. I never needed anyhting more or less. It would be nice to have some best friends, I wished I had a set up like Mark Amanda Jesse and Steve or like Harry Ron and Hermione or the Marauders before them but I don't. Maybe that will come later in life. The only thing I can do is Keep on living.
Ugly Duckling Out xx
Most People have a best friend, at least one, someone who knows them inside out. My mother has four, my brother has a few, my boyfriend, people I went to college with, people at uni, people at work. Everyone seems to have a bestfriend with the exception of me. Bit over dramatic, I'm sure there are people outthere who don't have best friends. Everyone I know seems to have at least one though.
Boyfriends aren't the same as bestfriends. I always seem to drift though I make friends but they never seem to stick. Like I'm that awkward puzzle piece that just floats over all the others and trys to fit with others.
I always thought this was a bad thing and then I realised I had something better, something that would and never could hurt me.
While most people have best friends, I have Harry Potter and Diagnosis Murder. This is not to say that I'm crazy, let me explain...
I don't remember the first time I watched Diagnosis Murder but I remeber vividly when I was at school. I used to set my video recorder every day for 3 years maybe. 2:15 on the dot and the recorder would do it's thing taping my precious programme, because, it was mine. Thats what I told myself anywho.
I can remember the way it felt, I would get home but I would never truly feel home until I sat down in front of that, It's strange, it was like a wave crashed over me and suddenly I was like a ghost, a mute who was a part of this wonderful world but at the same time I never truly was. I'm not crazy, I never used to imagine them talking to me or anything. It was just a sense of belonging a sense of wonderment and magic at it.
Potter was like this for me to, in particular Prisoner Of Azkaban, I only had to open the book and this wave crashed over we, this wave of feeling like I belonged somewhere. It was amazing.
On this feeling alone I got through anything and everything in my life, anytime I felt sad insecure, down upset, angry. I didn't need anyone to hug me, to comfort me to talk to.
I just used to open these books or watch this programme and everything would fade into oblivion. I imagine the rush could be compared to what an addict feels, because I did become addicted to them.
So while most people had best friends I had these. I never needed anyhting more or less. It would be nice to have some best friends, I wished I had a set up like Mark Amanda Jesse and Steve or like Harry Ron and Hermione or the Marauders before them but I don't. Maybe that will come later in life. The only thing I can do is Keep on living.
Ugly Duckling Out xx
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